I am almost 2 months into this new year and my #OneWord365 is playing out in ways I never anticipated. When God gave me this word, my first thought was “Ummm. . . . I don’t want that word, thankyouverymuch.”
But, alas, it was my word.
So as is typical of my personality and brain function, I tried to figure out (before the new year hit) what that may possibly look like.
Selflessness is a very definitive word, but at the same time I’m finding it to be very ambiguous because it can mask itself in many different ways. Some of which I’m very comfortable with. Others, not so much.
It seems the “others, not so much” are the ways it is choosing to find me so far this year.
I think this is the point where I say, “Hey! That’s okay. I’m cool with that. Look at me being all selfless and everything.”
But honestly, I can’t. I would be lying through my teeth if I said I’m embracing this word with everything in me.
Yet, at the same time, I really want to. I want to learn from this word, from everything God has planned for me through this word.
So here’s to transparency, honesty, a bit of kicking and screaming and well, a little bit of fear.
Now, will someone bring me my white flag, please?