The Heart of the Matter

fruit of the spirit | patience

January 28, 2012 By Mary Hess Leave a Comment

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Galatians 5:22-23 – ESV
²² But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, ²³ gentleness, self-control; against such things there is no law.

Y’all ain’t ready for this.

Today it’s all about patience – longsuffering for you KJV’ers.

So we all know that one of the attributes of the Fruit of the Spirit is patience.

And we all know the cliche we’ve used on a daily basis:

Lord, give me patience but hurry up!

But as I was studying for this post, I found some interesting information on patience. And I couldn’t wait to share it with you! Patience is a tricky thing. Well, at least I think so.

The Greek word makrothymia (patience) is defined as this:

1) patience, endurance, constancy, steadfastness, perseverance

2) patience, forbearance, longsuffering, slowness in avenging wrongs

Don’t worry. I’ll get back to those great words in just a bit, but I want to also you show you a synonym for makrothymia – hypomonē. Get this definition: the temper which does not easily succumb under suffering.

I don’t know about you but I think I’ve always thought about patience from a parental standpoint and from a “wait for the big thing to happen” standpoint. But if you look at a few of the definitions above, there’s a lot more to it than that.

A. Lot.

I never considered it patience to be slow to avenge wrongs. That’s huge. Let’s cross-reference it with a passage from 1 Corinthians:

Love is patient and kind; it does not envy or boast; 1 Corinthians 13:4

Our word patience is back – makrothymia
1) to be of a long spirit, not to lose heart
a) to persevere patiently and bravely in enduring misfortunes and troubles
b) to be patient in bearing the offenses and injuries of others
1) to be mild and slow in avenging
2) to be longsuffering, slow to anger, slow to punish

When we are full of Love (the first attribute in our study), we will be sure to have help in display the other attributes as well.

Let’s look at a few more Scriptures on patience:

Proverbs 19:11 – A man’s wisdom gives him patience; it is to his glory to overlook an offense.

Ecclesiastes 7:8 – The end of a matter is better than its beginning, and patience is better than pride.

Ouch. Don’t know about you but that sure hits home to me. If you look up the word “glory” you’ll see that it is defined as an “attribute of God.” So basically it’s an attribute of God to over look an offense.

Wow.

Colossians 3:12 – Therefore, as God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience.

Yet another passage above to clothe ourselves with patience.

Seems like it’s kinda important, eh? Oh, I know. It’s not the easiest thing to be – especially when you’ve been hurt, wronged or feel like you’re being held back from something. I get that. But He wants us to clothe ourselves in patience – and practice it.

Practice Patience.

Practice, practice, practice.

I think the ultimate example of patience is seen in 2 Peter 3:9,15 (NLT) when Peter shares about Christ’s 2nd coming:

The Lord isn’t really being slow about his promise, as some people think. No, he is being patient for your sake. He does not want anyone to be destroyed, but wants everyone to repent… And remember, our Lord’s patience gives people time to be saved. This is what our beloved brother Paul also wrote to you with the wisdom God gave him—

Isn’t that amazing?!

:::::

Whatcha think about patience?
Is it something that comes naturally to you?

Filed Under: fruit of the spirit

from martha to mary | personality or habit?

January 26, 2012 By Mary Hess 2 Comments

You know, when it all is said and done, I just want to be known for having a heart after God – just like David – because David did what God wanted him to do and that’s it – that’s what He wants more than anything. I want to be so consumed with Him that all of the “things” or “roles” I had craved before, trying to earn His love and your love and their love, come naturally and from a different motive.

But can I just be honest? (I don’t know why people say that line – including me – because I mean, really? Am I not being honest already? Maybe I should change it to But can I just be really transparent here? because that’s what I think I mean) Right now it’s still hard to come from a totally pure motive. I know that I definitely am coming from there more than from the wrong motives these days, but I still fight that urge to perform.

Why? Because for 30 some years that’s what I did. It became a habit – a lifestyle – so ingrained in me that I couldn’t tell where I stopped and where it started. Performance was me. I was Performance. We were so intertwined that if you had confronted me about it, I would have said, “That’s just who I am – you can’t change my personality – this is how I’m built.” I had become so comfortable in this mode of living and operating that I didn’t want to change it.

Because in my mind, changing it meant changing the very core of who I was (so I thought). So all of that time, all of that effort, all of performing would go away and what would I be left with? I thought I would be left with nothing but a weak, sappy, everyonewalkalloverme kind of personality complete with the inability to do anything. I thought that I would have to become the complete opposite – do a complete 180 degree turn – of what I currently was – of who I currently was.

And that terrified me.

And angered me.

I still couldn’t quite understand what was so wrong with being a Martha. I mean, she made things happen. Who would’ve fed Jesus that day, huh? Who would’ve cleaned the house getting ready for Him? Who would have sent out the party invites? Certainly not lazy Mary. Nope. She was too busy “loving and thinking about” Jesus. She was too enamored with Him to do anything.

Hmph.

So I got Martha. I. got. Martha.

And I admired her. I admired her for having the guts to say to Jesus, “Hey! Make her get up and do something dang it.” (ok – that’s a slight personal interpretation of the scripture, but I know she must have thought it!)

From time to time God would place people in my life who would challenge my way of thinking – who would challenge the facade I had up – who would call me out on certain behaviors. I’d like to say that instantly I was a changed person. But I wasn’t. Instead, over the course of the last 10 years, He has been working on me – sometimes with a jackhammer (well, it sure feels like it) or at times with a warm cloth and a gentle touch. But He hasn’t stopped working.

So here I am – 10 years later – able to admit my “Martha-ness” and even able to let go of some of that performing that I did so well. I’ve come to realize that my personality hasn’t changed one bit – but my heart sure has changed a lot.

And for that, I’m thankful.

Filed Under: martha to mary

she longs to be a princess | i entered a contest and didn’t win

January 24, 2012 By Mary Hess 2 Comments

So I entered a writing contest.

Because I’m crazy like that.

I didn’t win.

But it was a good learning curve, at least.

Here’s my entry.

She Longs To Be A Princess

I am lying in bed with my four year old as she crawls in next to me – face to face – nose to nose – as close as she can possibly get. This has become our nightly ritual. She won’t sleep unless I’m lying next to her. She burrows into my side and drapes her arms and legs over my body.

No.

It isn’t comfortable.

But I love every moment of it.

(Even though I know I need to let her learn to fall asleep on her own.)

“Momma, will you snuggle with me tonight and tell me a story?”

“Yes, my sweet baby. I will tell you a story and snuggle close to you.”

She catches her breath and smiles as big as Texas.

“Can I be a princess?!” she asks.

“You can be whatever you want,” I say, meaning that with every fiber of my being.

She longs to be a princess complete with the ball gowns, crown and castle.

And so I begin.

Once upon a time in a kingdom far, far away lived a little princess named Zoe. Zoe was born to the King and Queen at Christmas and the kingdom was jubilant at her birth.

Zoe was a beautiful princess with long auburn hair and big brown eyes. Her smile would melt the toughest soul and bring laughter to the saddest heart.

She was the apple of her daddy’s eye. There was nothing he wouldn’t do for her. He loved her with an everlasting love. His daughter was captivating and he wanted everyone in the kingdom to know it.

“Momma, am I wearing a pretty dress and does Daddy like it?” she asks as we lie there in the dark bedroom.

“Yes, Zoe. You are wearing a beautiful dress that swishes when you twirl for Daddy. He loves it – almost as much as he loves you!”

She sighs and says, “Tell me more, Momma.”

And so I tell her of how thrilling it is to dance with her Father. I tell her how wonderful it is to be loved and cherished and wanted. I tell her that nothing she can ever say or do will cause her Daddy and Mommy to stop loving her, cherishing her, wanting her. I tell her that she will always be our daughter, even when she marries Prince Charming.

She giggles. “I’m never going to get married, Momma!”

And lying there in the dark, snuggled in close with this beautiful life I birthed, my heart captures the moment, the feeling of complete, unconditional love for this child. I’m reminded yet again how nothing could ever dissolve my love for her, nothing. She belongs to me. She is my daughter.

In an instant my thoughts turn to Him, my heavenly Papa. I find myself crying out from the recesses of my weary, jaded heart,
“Do You love me like that Papa?!

Do You find me captivating?!

Am I enough?!”

And in the quiet, my heart waits, silently hoping that He will answer me, yet doubting He really will.

I want to be that princess, that little girl who longs for her Daddy’s undivided attention, and knows that she has it. I want to be that little girl who runs with reckless abandon after her Father dancing and twirling and laughing and playing.

But am I?

Could I ever be?

All I’ve ever known is a life of rules and regulations, of do’s and don’ts. I had the mindset that believing in God and living a life following Him wasn’t meant to be fun, playful, or enjoyable. Could my empty, barren heart embrace the desire buried deep to be my Father’s princess?

Then I hear Him – just as clear as if He was sitting there on the edge of the bed beside us.

“My sweet Mary, you are beautiful. And you are more than enough. I find you simply captivating.”

My breath catches.

And in that moment, in that dark, quiet bedroom, I finally understand.

His heart beats for me just like my heart beats for her.

Yes, she is a princess.

And so am I.